Tag Archive | "rant"

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I’m not cut out for the World Wide Web

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***adult language and ego-trip rant warning ***  On Tuesday I got an unexpected surprise when I opened my browser.  My homepage is set to Reddit.com (the front-page of the Internet) because I enjoy keeping up with whatever depraved and wacky meme is popular that minute.  The second post on my front page was about the Elf on the Shelf.  I clicked.  Then my heart dropped as I saw my Dexter Morgan elf, an entry into the Inappropriate Elf contest on Baby Rabies from last year, in the picture gallery.  The title of the post was “My Friend is posting these pics of their “Elf on the Shelf.”  The only trouble is that I’m not that person’s friend and those other elves were also lifted from various websites.  I recognized another from this year’s contest.

My Dexter Elf made the front page of Reddit.  That’s a pretty huge deal considering Reddit can bestow upon a website more traffic in one day that most blogs see in a year.  I took it upon myself to call out the poster for being dishonest, and while a few people saw it (maybe 300 clicked over to my post here for verification) it largely went unnoticed.

I couldn’t sleep I was so mad.  I was mad at myself for not watermarking my image; I felt originally it would take away from the story of the images and part of me stupidly thought my little blog would never have images stolen and re-used without credit.  I was mad at someone who decided they wanted Internet points so they would use my image that I was very proud of.  Seriously- that is one of my favorite posts I have ever made and as a huge Dexter fan it was that much cooler to pull it off in such an awesome way.  I was just steaming mad.

After the world saw my picture for the 15 minutes it was front page several other huge Facebook fanpages decided to cash in and uploaded it to their pages.  It has been shared thousands of times without a single link to my blog, a tag to my Facebook page, or any credit to me whatsoever.  It’s so wrong and it just freaking sucks.  I’ve been in a pissy mood all day and as much as I tell myself that I’m pissed about a picture on the Internet (saying it out-loud kinda helps because it sounds so trivial) it didn’t help much.  It was MY picture.  MY idea.  MY IMAGINARY INTERNET POINTS (ok… I don’t care about that but I did re-submit my Dexter Elf in retribution to let it be known he was stolen and so far I have over 600 upvotes on Reddit.  Justice is mine).

But truly, what hurts the most is seeing so many people (thousands) commenting on the photo on how AWESOME it is.  And not one of those people knew it was me.  That just kills.  God I sound vain, but it is true.  I am very protective over my ideas (I’ve even ranted about this before) and it truly upsets me when an original idea of mine is taken from me on purpose.  Imagine if you painted an amazing picture and it was accepted into a gallery for an exhibition but the artist named wasn’t you, it was a guy called BeefAddict.  It would sting, wouldn’t it?

 

I’ve messaged the blogs who posted without permission and the pages I’ve seen who uploaded it too.  Not one has removed the image, given credit where it is due, or even responded.  Why are people such ass-hats?

 I’m trying to sound as least self-righteous as possible: I just don’t understand why someone would take a picture from the internet to score imaginary points and steal credit from others in the process?  How can someone think this is OK?  Wouldn’t it feel better to create your own share-worthy content?  Or to share it and tell others you think it is awesome while still giving credit where it is due?  Stealing content is stealing.  Saving a photo from the Internet for personal use- well that’s what it is.  Saving a photo and using on your blog as if it is your own, or even using it and not crediting the source is just wrong.  Do you know how websites get ranked? Incoming links are gold for bloggers and the more links they get the better search engines like their pages.

Sometimes people find images they think are cool and they share them on their personal pages.  But when someone who runs a Facebook page with 500k likes shares a photo they best be crediting someone.  They should know better.  And when someone posts to Reddit to earn imaginary Internet bonus points for work that isn’t their own because they are pathetic (for the record, posting to Reddit for imaginary points is cool but stealing the thunder that isn’t yours is not).  And blogs… tsk tsk.  Blogging is pretty complicated and there are spoken and unspoken rules.  A spoken rule is give credit.  LINK.  And sometimes you really just need to ask for permission to use an image, but not always.

Recently someone messaged me on my page and asked to use one of my Elf on the Shelf ideas in a post and she would of course give credit back with a link.  I said yes.  Later on she sent me the link.  You guys- she did it all right (well… mostly.  They watermarked my image with their logo which I’m not happy with but I haven’t asked them to remove it either…).  Major imaginary Internet points to you Monica Beyer of AllParenting.com.

allparentingelfontheshelfblogpost

I know many of my readers are bloggers.  Maybe you just blog for family and friends, for fun, or maybe you are hoping to make a more serious job of it.  If that is you, or even if it isn’t and you just like sharing images you like on Facebook or Pinterest, check for a source.  Kindly share the source with your readers and friends.  Oh and blogger friends, no matter how small your blog, it is always a good idea to watermark.  It takes more time but I wouldn’t be writing this today if I had just added a little marky-mark to my Dexter images.  I am much better about it now that Pinterest is so popular and often images get shared without being linked to the source.  At least with my website’s watermark it might get found.

Jill from Baby Rabies, who has fought this battle a million times, addressed this issue and more beautifully in her post “Think and Link Before You Share.

I’m not saying everyone who has shared something from the Internet without giving credit or a link was doing it to either claim the content as their own or the maliciously prevent the owner from getting credit.  Most people truly have no idea that this crazy World Wide Web has a secret code of ethics.

I’m so glad I’m flying on an underlying high of great feedback from a recent video I posted (Cloth Diapering in the 1950′s) because it has given me the faith in humanity to keep fighting.  This post is all kinds of bitter, bitchy, and venti (I had to spell vent-y like a coffee because, duh, it is yummy) but sometimes that is the benefit of having a blog.  You can pound out your frustrations in writing and the act of doing so magically makes you feel better.  And you know what?  I already do feel better.  Maybe I can survive the World Wide Web after-all, but only after a good rant.

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Be Original. Be Creative. Be Ethical. Blogging Rant

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<rant>

Being original and having my own ideas is extremely important to me.  I started Dirty Diaper Laundry with the unique idea to allow potential cloth diapering parents the opportunity to “virtually” shop for diapers using my library of videos.  I didn’t start out with a clear path- blogging and cloth diapering were both new to me.  I shaped my videos and molded them into what I feel has become my signature style.

In my career I have made it a point to be ignorant of other cloth diaper blogs.  I pride myself on having original content thought up while laying in bed each night and not by reading another blog and saying “Hey, that is a great idea I should write about that too.”  A part of me wants to be supportive of the other blogs and moms but I can’t take the risk of inadvertently stealing an idea so I don’t often visit them unless I see a link to a post that I’m comfortable visiting.

What that means to the readers is that they can trust my content and my intentions.  What that means to me is that I can sleep soundly at night and be at peace with my conscience.

When I see other posts, blogs, and videos that are farming ideas from my own or from friends it pisses me off.  I have run into other blogs that have taken my Star Rating System and made a minor change to it for their own uses.  I’ve noticed the style of my videos down to the letter being copied.  Even ideas for posts I felt were very original seemed to then pop up elsewhere.

I’m not afraid of competition but only if the competition is playing fair.  

I can’t copyright my ratings system, the style of my videos that I developed over almost 3 years, or the ideas I come up with.  I can’t even prevent people from copying my blog format (I believe I was the first cloth diaper blog to independently sell ads in this format.)  The only thing I can do is hope that enough of you recognize the hard work I have poured into Dirty Diaper Laundry and continue to visit and tell your friends!  I don’t have an ad budget; I rely on word of mouth to help DDL grow.  I also hope that anyone who has taken my ratings or other ideas will quietly do the right thing and revisit your system and come up with something that is your own and not mine.  I’ve considered emailing the parties in question but since they obviously visit my site it is just easier to do it in a post.    Sadly, I’ve had ideas that I thought were great and when I researched to see if it existed, and it did, I backed off.  No need to redo something that is already working.

Blogging is a hard job and there is always someone out there ready to take your place as soon as you let them.  The competitive part of me is afraid to take any time off during our move for that reason.  Besides, I am brimming with good ideas that I want to share with the world.

I may be coming off as catty (I am) and bitchy (I am) and pissed off (I defintely am) but I have stood by while others benefit from 3 years of learning and development on my part.  I didn’t start out as a successful blog- I worked my fingers to the bone to get here.  And I’m not even the most successful or popular.  Seeing a video this morning that was a clone of my own except with different hands/voice was the straw that broke this blogger’s back!

I truly appreciate all of you that come here for cloth diaper information.  I just love seeing the comments you have here and on my fanpage.  I love even more when I see someone talk about DDL on a messageboard.  Blogging is an ever evolving job and I have to do my best to keep up with the medium but I make damn sure to do so with my integrity in tact.  I may get inspiration elsewhere but the core ideas behind my posts, my videos, my design, and my database are purely my own.  That is my pledge to you and me.  I am a nice, giving person and I feel taken advantage of.  Nothing hurts worse than feeling used.

</rant> (a little html humor for the geeks out there!)

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Will Hollywood Ever Portray Babywearing Correctly?

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*Bang*

That is the sound of me shooting my TV Screen at yet another show that has incorrectly, and dangerously, portrayed a baby being worn in a carrier.

You might be thinking, “Who Cares?  The actor is just wearing a creepy doll, no babies were harmed in the making of that film.”

Hollywood makes money because people, millions of them, watch TV, commercials, and movies.  And then they buy what the actor is wearing, or eat at the restaurant they talk about, or cut their hair the way that actress did, well, you get the picture.

I’m not underestimating the intelligence of every American, but when you see this on the silver screen, some people might actually think that is the proper way to wear a baby in a sling.

Not a purse, that is a baby in a sling

Notice how low and covered the baby is

My Idiot Brother: The fact that this movie (My Idiot Brother) was made very recently, after the CPSC issued a warning about the safety of slings and still chose to portray a baby being worn in such a clearly unsafe manner, is just baffling.

I try to put myself on the set during filming.  Do no mothers (or people with common sense) work on set?  Not a single soul spoke up to the director or actor?

Grey’s Anatomy: Another case of unsafe babywearing was during last season of Grey’s Anatomy.  Mark wore newborn Sophia in an Ergo.  Yes, this is really awesome because in general most shows depict babies facing out in crotch danglers.

Mark wearing the Ergo

Unfortunately he was wearing a newborn in the Ergo without an insert, the chest clip wasn’t fastened, and she was positioned far too low.  This show is seen by over 9 million viewers.  What if just one mother thought this was OK and wore her infant this way?  And what if that baby slid out from the side or suffocated?  That is one baby too many.  The previous week Callie wore Sophia in a ring sling but made it look like a full time job by clutching at the bottom for dear life.  And I wanted to spread the fabric over her shoulder so bad I couldn’t stand it.  {View a clip on Carry Me Away}

Sears: In the “close but no cigar” category is the recent Sears ad that has gotten so much airplay I have seen it at least 5 times, and I don’t get to watch a lot of TV.

A couple is seen shopping for appliances and the mother is seen wearing a small baby (doll) in a STRETCHY WRAP.

Good try, Sears

#Win for putting a lesser known baby carrier out for the world to see.

#Fail for having the poor baby (doll) incorrectly positioned so that it still seems to be hanging way too low, and the face is smushed into the mother’s chest.  Mom is also clutching the baby, likely to hide the fact that it is a doll, but it makes her look uncomfortable with wearing it, as if she thinks the baby will fall out at any moment.  {view commercial here}

Breathe.  

It is just TV.

I just don’t get why it is so hard to portray babywearing correctly.  Real moms do it every day.  We put our baby in our carrier the way they should be worn so that they are safe and comfortable.  Can’t someone behind the scenes take an extra minute to consult the INTERNET, or hell, even read the instruction manual that came with the carrier being filmed, to keep babies in the real world safe?

And my final thought: Hollywood, please stop glorifying the crotch dangler!!!  We babywearing moms love that you are starting to look past the Baby Bjorn to more comfortable carriers…. just do your research before you film the next movie, ok?

SNL almost had it right, I bet those babies are frog legged

Am I overthinking this? I’d also love to hear where else you have seen babywearing on TV or in movies, especially if the baby was worn correctly! I wrote this post for International Babywearing Week because this topic has been nagging me for a long time.

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37 Weeks. Full Term. Homebirth inevitable. Holy Crap!

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Today I am 37 weeks pregnant.  I am full term.  The baby *should* be fully developed, lungs mature, ready to meet me whenever he is ready.  I am hoping for later rather than sooner.  He seems pretty cozy in there for now.  I had to reach 37 weeks in order for me to give birth at home and today is the day.  Holy Crap.

37 Weeks

Hi Belly!

I am stressing because now my house has to stay clean.  Try telling that to my husband and son!  While I am going to admit that I feel pretty darn good for 37 weeks, picking toys up off the floor, constantly washing, drying, folding, putting away clothes, and washing dishes is not as easy as it was a few months ago.  I tried to convey this to my husband but I still see a sink full of dishes.  I tried to tell my son and he still threw a bunch of books on the floor.  *sigh*

My back up birth tub will arrive tomorrow according to UPS.  I am aiming to rent an AquaDoula but if the mother currently renting it doesn’t deliver in time before me then I have a back-up Fishy Pool.  My birth kit is pretty much stocked except for paper towels (we don’t use them anymore so I have to remember to buy them!) and a naturally sweetened Gatorade alternative since I cannot have the real stuff with Gestational Diabetes.  My tiny diapers are laid out along with a tiny t-shirt and a tiny blanket and a tiny hat.

The funny thing is, I have NO CLUE what this kid is going to look like.  I dreamed about my first son.  We had a few 4D ultrasounds and could tell he had pouty lips and a tiny chin like me.  This boy hasn’t even let us see a profile when we had ultrasounds.  I can’t even guess what nose and chin he has.  Will he have dark hair like Daddy, or will he have my blonde hair like my son?

I can’t say I am feeling excited, or nervous, or dread.  I am trying to relish the time I have left as a mother of one.  I am giving extra cuddles to my boy and loving on him like there is no tomorrow.  I keep telling him about the baby in my belly, which he likes to blow raspberries on, roll his toy cars over, and lift his shirt to bump his belly against.  Sometimes, he points to his belly and says “baby.”  He might be a little confused.  Hey, he is only 22 months!

I keep trying to imagine what the birth is going to be like.  I don’t know if that is a good or bad thing.  In my mind, I will go to 40 weeks or later.  I will have a long labor, but I will have a lot of support.  But what if I go next week?  And what if my labor isn’t that long?  I kind of want a somewhat long labor since I have to get my midwife here (1.5 hour commute).  I need time to make sure my house is ready in case it wasn’t before.  I need time to mentally prepare myself to give birth again!  This time, drug free!

Then what?  I will have a new nursling and a rambunctious and lovable toddler.  I want to think this is my last baby.  I feel like it is.  We will see.

In case you are wondering, I do plan on Tweeting and Facebooking during my labor.  My husband or doula will likely take over as things progress and I want to throw things.  I will use a #twitterbirth hashtag.  If it is me tweeting I will sign “-K” and if it is hubby, he will be “-S.”  If my doula decides to take a turn expect an “M.”  There may or may not be non graphic photos involved.  I might tweet often, I might only tweet every hour or longer.  I don’t know how this whole thing is going down!  If you aren’t already, follow me on Twitter- @KimRosas- and “like” me on Facebook – Dirty Diaper Laundry Fan Page- so you will get an update as I go into labor.

If you read everything on this page, congratulations, you just read a stream of consciousness, unedited blog post from the brain of a pregnant lady!

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