My family and I just returned home from a short notice trip to Tampa, Florida.  This was our first plane trip as an entire family since Everett joined us.  I’ve been places with just Everett, and prior to him being born we have taken many plane trips with just Fletcher.  Having two children can certainly make things logistically challenging.  We chose to take 2 car seats and check them, plus luggage for 2 adults, two kids, diaper bag for the plane trip, laptop bag for husband’s work, snacks, and a few toys.

I’ll be talking about why we went to Tampa at a later date, but for now I’d like to list out a few of the tips I use for flying with kids that have been successful.  Flying was the least stressful part of our trip considering we were almost stuck in Orlando, 1.5 hours from our hotel, with no way to rent a car or leave the airport.  LONG STORY, but believe me when I tell you it would make a great new movie in the National Lampoon’s Vacation series…

Tip 1:  Bring a Ring Sling!

Unless you are really keen on back carries a ring sling is the perfect airport carrier.  It can be compacted and rolled into your diaper bag, it works for any age baby, can be used for a hip carry, tummy to tummy, and the kangaroo hold (for younger babies with head support).  Not only is it good to keep your hands free at the airport- it doubles as a nursing cover if you want one, and I even use it to wrap around myself and the baby while they sit in your lap.  Talk about versatile!  Oh….. and if you need to cover the little one or need a makeshift pillow it can do that too.  I love my Soft-Structure Carriers like my Boba but with the buckles and bulk it isn’t quite as convenient at the airport.

I used my ring sling to cover the top of my breast while Ev nursed

Tip 2:  Let em’ Roam

I hate flying with crawling age babies because I am a firm believer in letting them roam while waiting for the plane, whether it be before the first flight or on a layover.  Babies and toddlers can’t grasp the concept of “sitting still” as well as we do, so giving them plenty of exercise before a flight will hopefully “get the wiggles” out enough that they are willing to sit and read books, color, or play a game.  This trip my husband and I took turns walking the aisles of the airport.  At one point my boys started holding hands and walking…. trust me when I tell you that this sight made the day of many travelers and weary pilots.  Everyone that passed let out an “awwwww…”

Roaming the halls

Tip 3:  Find a Safe Play Area

Tip 3 goes right along with Tip 2.  For non mobile and crawling babies, if you can find an airport play area, use it.  If it is disgusting beyond belief then make a judgement call.  Not every airport has a play area though.  I ASSUMED Orlando would have one considering it probably has more pint sized travelers than any other airport in the US but I was wrong.  They did have an arcade and we chose this as our play area… Fletcher got to play some games and even Steven and I got to kill time and play games like air hockey and pinball.  Everett was entertained by the flashing lights and noise.  Win/Win/Win.

Tip 4: Bring Strategic Entertainment

In the past my diaper bag has been packed to max capacity with activities for Fletcher.  I even brought a puppet at one point…. With two boys I had to think in terms of what items they could both share and what would entertain them the longest.  For Fletcher we let him pack his own tiny backpack that he would carry around.  He chose to bring a few tiny trains, a monster truck, a sticker, a lego train, a train book, and a piece of his motorcycle game.  I packed Everett’s 2 favorite board books and some snacks (including pouches which are the perfect airport snack food for both boys).  The final piece of the entertainment puzzle was the iPad.  It is space saving and contains more than enough games to occupy both boys.  We also have a few shows for the really desperate times.  The books for Everett and the tiny trains for Fletcher were the most used.  I read and re-read Quiet, Loud 100 times.  You can also get creative- whn the light was just right we did shadow puppets!

Tip 5:  Let the Kid have the Window

If you have a child with a seat then let them have the window.  It will give them a wall to rest their head if they sleep, and they might like seeing the view.  If they are terrified then you can always switch places and close the window.

Tip 6:  Bring Noise Cancelling Headphones/ Ear Plugs

The first flight with Fletcher had him yelling that he didn’t like the airplane.  In the airport he explained that he thought it was loud.  On our return trip we gave him the noise cancelling headphones and he promptly fell asleep.  If your kid will let you put in ear plugs you can try that too.

Fletcher wearing headphones and sleeping

Tip 7: Forget the Routine

If your life is dictated by naps schedules and set meal and snack times then you may want to lose your watch.  If 12:00 rolls around and you make your child nap at the airport while waiting for the plane then they will be wired and ready to roll once boarding comes.  I always keep them up as long as possible before we board, even if they look like zombies.  This paid off big time when it was time for our second flight on the way home.  By take-off Everett had already passed out on my lap.  Even after napping far later than normal they still went to bed at a reasonable time that night.

Both kids snoozing soundly on me

I’ve learned over the years to care less about the other passengers and just worry with making the trip as easy and enjoyable as possible for my kids. I used to be so tense and stressed if one child cried or yelled that my energy was spent frantically making them stop. Of course crying isn’t good but it is normal, especially during take-off and landing. if you are nursing then putting the baby on the breast during those times will help their ears pop. Older kids can be given a drink or snack to swallow. Bigger kids can have gum if you allow it.

What are your favorite travel tips with children or babies?

{Email subscribers should click over to see the embedded video} I love spending time with my family during the Holidays.  This means there are get togethers and maybe even a party or two.  These events, at least in my family, are LOUD and packed with people you see only once or twice a year and some people you see often.

As much as I advocate for women to nurse in public I will admit that I am nervous about nursing in front of my own family.  I haven’t put my finger on the reason.  Part of it could be that I am not very comfortable around some of my family members to begin with, and part could be the fear of slipping and showing more of my breast than I would like to.

I do not use covers and don’t plan to start now.  Everett wouldn’t have it either.  He is also a very distracted nurser so I have to either find a quiet place to nurse him, or come armed with items that make it easier for him to nurse without popping off every 5 seconds and exposing my nipple.

When I went to the ABC Kids Expo I was fortunate enough to find a few things (and came home with them too!) that do just that.  I show them off on my video embedded above, but I’ve also written more about them.

The first is the Toni Top designed by the same woman who masterminded the (uh-ma-zing) Pumpease Handsfree Nursing Bra.  The Toni Top is meant to be worn by women who are pregnant, nursing, or not nursing.  It doesn’t look like a maternity or breastfeeding top.  In fact, it is one of the most stylish tops in my wardrobe right now.  The criss-crossed panels move up or down to allow you to nurse discreetly.  I demo-ed the top at ABC and was able to easily keep myself covered whenever Ev decided, on a whim, to pop off.  It makes nursing a distracted toddler easy.  I will say that you have to find just the right nursing bra to work with the top since it is cut in a diamond shape.  Your bra will need straps that are wider set.  I have found my HOTMilk and Cake Lingerie to be the best fit, however they still can show.  I do usually just  put a black tank top with 1 inch straps on under.  These will cover my straps.  I would also love for it to come in an XS and more colors, perhaps a goldenrod yellow or avocado green?! (I just saw that Smoke is the next color and they will have a pencil skirt to match.  I need them BOTH!)

My second “MUST HAVE” for nursing in public and keeping Everett happy and contained is my Mommy Necklace.  I’ve been a fan since I discovered them early in my first son’s life, so almost 3 years ago now.  I only have a couple but I could easily buy more if my wallet let me.  Mommy Necklaces are designed to be handled by babies but look stylish.  They have various styles, lengths, and pendant choices.  I prefer the dangling donut myself.

When you really need a baby to be entertained you will want to bring out the big guns…. the Nourish.  Nourish is the classier cousin of the Snazzy.  I used to use the Snazzy when I was flying and needed to keep the little hands occupied.  Nourish is a more toned down version of  Snazzy.  It still has a lot of color to it, but it keeps to a jewel tone family and not primary colors and rainbows.  The beads are more rounded in case you are babywearing (the Snazzy had a few square beads and Raelynn explained her reason for changing this was for babywearing in case the baby was laying on it) but it is still a fun necklace for the baby to explore.

Another option in the necklace department would be Teething Bling.  It is more simple than a Mommy Necklace but provides something for the babies to nibble on and the large donut is easily palmed.  They offer a variety of colors and some patterns.  I have a bronze and black and wear them both; they happen to match most of my wardrobe.

A Mother’s Boutique saw my post of me nursing my son in the Toni Top and said I was so pretty in it (Judy, I had to tell someone!) that she would love me to review it and would love to sponsor a giveaway.  I had planned on posting about the top at some point anyways since I love it so much, so a giveaway in conjunction is just icing on the cake!  In case you aren’t aware, Judy is the Boobie Whisperer and can help any of you find the perfect nursing bra.  She offers virtual fittings too.

Now for the Giveaway!!!  I will be giving a Toni Top away to one lucky DDL reader.  I also have a Nourish Necklace that I was given at ABC Kids to give to one of my readers!  Enter on the Rafflecopter below.  You will need Javascript enabled to enter.

Select links included in this post are affiliate links.  I will receive a small percentage of any purchases made through them , so thank you!

This review and giveaway is part of the New Baby Event Part 2!

It is absolutely no secret that Bravado is my favorite nursing bra company.  I have become an unofficial evangelist to my readers (you guys) and anyone else I meet in person or online looking for advice on a great nursing bra.  In fact, I recently wrote about my quest to find my perfect nursing bra and how many crummy ones I bought before meeting Bravado.  I also took a belly photo every week wearing a bra and bottoms.  It turns out that I am wearing a Bravado bra in every single photo (and the tank top in my 41 weeker!)  You can view my “ad” for Bravado bras here. It seems I have reviewed almost every bra they make, and they are all fabulous, but my favorite is the Bliss.

Up until recently I had never had the pleasure of trying their Essential Nursing Bra Tank. Recently though, Melissa from Bravado was kind enough to send one for me to review.  Having a newborn means nursing very frequently.  It also means you need easy access and full coverage at home and on the go. A good nursing tank is truly an essential for a new mother!!!

What you’ll love about the Essential Nursing Bra Tank:

• Proprietary design gives you a full support (molded) bra on the inside, a beautiful shape and cottony comfort, all in one!
• Perfect to wear every day as you are out and about, around the house, going to yoga class, lounging or as sleepwear.
• Imagine…you’ll look terrific, feel great and it is easy to nurse in public because it provides tummy coverage where you need it.
• Fabric gently stretches while retaining its shape after washing. A two for one value because it is easy to find your tank size while pregnant and then continue to wear it after birth
• Soft, high-quality cotton/spandex outer fabric isn’t see through, even in white
• Cups drop down and away from your body, giving baby complete access and providing you and your baby with skin-to-skin contact
• Discrete nursing clips allow full breastfeeding access and only you will know this is a nursing tank
• Long length gives you a beautiful and flattering shape that’s fitted but not clingy, with a great hip length

What makes the Bravado Essential Nursing tank better than the other nursing tank tops I have tried:

No uniboob! Virtually every other tank top I have tried smooshes my girls together to creat one boob.  Not flattering.

Support! While I am not as well endowed as others, I have D cups so I do need a fair amount of support.  This tank keeps them where they belong, above my belly button and then some!

Quality! Bravado products are made extremely well and it shows.  I have no problems wearing this tank top with an open sweater or jacket.  It is visible but doesn’t scream “hey I am a nursing bra!”

Discretion! The nursing clips are discreet and flat.  No one can tell they are there unless you point them out.

Wearing the Essential Tank while in labor

I started wearing this tank top while I was pregnant, probably around 38 weeks when it came in the mail.  It stretched to fit over my belly.  It was so comfortable I chose to put it on while I was in labor after I got out of the shower!  I labored in it for a couple of hours before I got into the birth tub.  (You can see me “modeling” the Essential Tank in photos featured in my homebirth video)

Since giving birth I have worn the Bravado nursing tank over 2 dozen times at least!  Every time I do laundry I make sure this is included.  It usually gets grabbed out of the dryer or basket to be worn right away.

I prefer this tank top for daytime use.  The discreet nursing clips are a little harder to maneuver at night because they twist in rather then a straight pull on clip.  This allows the clips to be completely flat so wearing the tank top out and about is possible without telling the world you are in a nursing top.  I would rather wear a traditional style nursing tank top at night, or another easy to nurse in top.

My favorite time to wear the Bravado nursing tank has to be when I am babywearing.  I pair the tank top with an open over shirt or a button down sweater, something that leaves my tank top exposed at the top.  While wearing my son I can undo the clips and latch him on easily.  The tank top is also pretty slimming and flattering so that doesn’t hurt!

Another reason I love this tank top is that it is a V neck.  Most nursing tank tops I have seen are scoop neck and not as flattering for my bust.  This also has ruching in the center.

And lastly, Bravado Nursing Tanks come in more colors than you can find with other brands.  Besides the wardrobe staples of black and white, there is chocolate, purple, pink, teal, and green.  I chose the chocolate.  It has matched so many of my tops!

I can’t stress this enough: when it comes to nursing attire, spend the money the first time on a product that works!  I promise, if you buy the Essential Nursing Bra Tank you will wear it twice a week or more for the entirety of your nursing career.  And if you are like me, you are in it for the long haul.  49.00 is nothing for 1-2 years of comfort and quality.  Plus, you can continue wearing if long after nursing thanks to the discreet clips.  If you are having more kids, it is an even better investment piece for your wardrobe.

Bravado always has amazing sweepstakes going on.  Click the image to enter!

Bravado Designs is also sponsoring a giveaway for an Essential Nursing Tank for one lucky DDL Reader!

Mandatory Entry:

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An Essential Nursing Bra Tank Top was sent for the purposes of this review.  No other compensation was received and all opinions expressed are 100% my own and genuine.  Seriously!  Giveaway ends on Dec 7. Winner will be chosen using random.org. If the winner does not respond within 48 hours a new winner will be drawn. *Open to US and Canada*

After all of the troubles I had nursing my first son in the beginning, I had looked forward to a very easy go of it with baby number 2.  I knew how to get a baby latched, all of the different positions, what breastfeeding pillow worked best for me, and so on.  On the second day of nursing my nipples started to blister.  I was in terrible pain by the afternoon!  I tweeted about my problems and a few people responded: “Is your baby tongue tied?”

I had heard of this before but had not thought to check.  According to tonguetie.net it is:

Tongue Tie – also known as ‘Ankyloglossia’ or ‘anchored tongue’ – is a common but often overlooked condition.

It is seen at birth and causes a wide range of difficulties that affect the sufferer in different ways. Diagnosis and assessment are essential before taking any remedial action. In the past, there was little besides observation or anecdotal evidence to guide us towards a decision about whether to intervene. Now, both diagnosis and assessment of a tongue tie can be made by informed and qualified professionals.

Sure enough, I looked at the underside of my son’s tongue and saw that the “frenum” (thingy that anchors your tongue) extended to the very tip.  He could not extend his tongue past his bottom lip.

So now what?

I know tongue tied babies could have the frenum “clipped.”  I was 100% sure he was tongue tied, so I called my pediatrician.  We were in a pickle since my pediatrician didn’t even know we had another baby!  We had planned on waiting over a week to call.  Our midwife advised us that most peds are not homebirth friendly and if we called earlier, would demand us to bring him in sooner.

The phone conversation was awkward.

“So…….. we had a baby a couple of days ago and need to have him seen.  We think he is tongue tied and would like to see about having it clipped.”

“What is his name?  Where was he born? etc..”

“Everett R. Home.”

*chirp chirp*

They were able to see us in 30 minutes so we rushed to get ready.  This was Everett’s first time out of the house.

Once there, the reaction of the receptionist and nurse regarding the lack of paperwork that the office had on our baby was a little funny.  They weighed him and all of that fun stuff.  Then the doctor showed up and immediately said “We don’t clip tongues.”

Really?!

He did get a phone call into an Ear Nose and Throat doctor that he felt sure clipped tongues.  She was able to see us in a couple of hours.  Our baby was given a clean bill of health from the pediatrician, who said he was beautiful and the picture of health, and we left for the next doctor.

The ENT saw our son after a very long wait.  I had to nurse my son in public for the first time in the waiting room here.  Considering my nipples were raw, this was very difficult.  I had to use the football hold in a waiting room chair.

As soon as she saw my son she confirmed he was definitely tongue tied.  He was a 3 out of 4 regarding the severity.  Great.  No wonder my nipples were screaming in pain.

She let us know that she could clip him that day in the office.  We asked a few questions.  My main concern was the pain and how it would affect his nursing afterwards.  She assured me that the clipping would hurt very little, and only for a moment.  I was going to wait outside and my husband held him for the procedure.  They did apply a topical numbing agent.  It took seconds, I heard a cry, and I was called back in.  I immediately dropped my nursing tank and latched him on, bloody mouth and all.

He calmed down instantly and nursed.  Literally, the moment he latched I could tell he was nursing better.  While it still hurt because my nipples were blistered and raw, it only hurt while he latched.

Once he was finished we packed him in the car seat and drove home.  I felt such relief about our decision to clip his tongue.  I was also grateful we caught it early.  Prior to the clipping, nursing was so painful I winced and tensed up for the entire session, especially on my left side.  Had I not called that day my nipples would have gotten even worse.  In situations like this, the sooner you can clip the tongue, the better.

Eating from "righty"

Today I can happily say I am 95% pain free! My right side has healed completely and I can latch him in any position now, even while wearing him and walking around!  My left side was worse so it still has a little healing to do.  I still get less pain when I use the football hold or cradle.  Side lying in bed is harder and can still cause a wince, but at night I am too lazy to sit up and nurse so I have just dealt with it.  I believe by tomorrow I am going to be 100% ok.  I did favor my left side by pumping on occasion to give my nipple a break, and I used a nipple shield a few times when it was very painful.

To those who have never heard of this condition, it sounds barbaric to clip a piece of the tongue.  I understand.  It seems harsh.  However, I have seen with my own eyes how quickly the pain disappears.  To me, nothing is more important that salvaging the nursing relationship.  I worked for over a month with Lactation Consultants to perfect my first son’s latch.  This time, a small medical procedure was needed.  Even though he was getting enough milk, over time it could have affected my supply.  And of course, me being in extreme pain would have made continuing breastfeeding very hard.

If you suspect your baby is tongue tied, due to a painful and shallow latch, or of course, if you notice their tongue is anchored underneath, it is very wise to at least have them looked at.  I promise, it sounds terrible, but clipping their tongue will be worth it.  Other than breastfeeding problems, tongue tied babies can have trouble eating solids and can even develop speech problems.

image courtesy of Stanford Medical.

This review was performed by DDL Contributor Kristen.

I was given the opportunity to review a hat made by lcraftanddesign on Etsy.  I discovered her store on Etsy because a while ago I reviewed a hat by MoBoleez, which was made for helping the breastfeeding mom to nurse discreetly by having the baby wear the hat and the brim is so wide that it covers everything.  It quickly became my favorite method of discreetly nursing in public.  The only problem was that my baby kept growing, and then the hat no longer fit her head.  I was in the market for a summer hat for my baby anyway (we spend our days at the beach, the pool and the park) and I figured if I found one with a really wide brim, it could serve a double purpose.

I found what I was looking for at lcraftanddesign’s Etsy store. The hats she sells through her store have such adorable designs that I had a hard time choosing!  I finally chose the “Crazy Daisy” patterned sun hat.  When I received the hat, I could tell that it was well made, in addition to being adorable!  One of the things I liked about it was that it has ties on it to help keep it on my 6 month olds head.  She isn’t too good about getting hats off yet but I know it’s in the near future and there’s always the wind to contend with when outside so the ties help to keep the hat securely on her head. They also help to make me feel secure that when I use it for nursing, I can reliably know that it won’t fall off her head and randomly expose what is going on underneath there!

Compared to the MoBoleez Nursing hat, this one did have a smaller diameter brim, although it was wider than pretty much any other sun hat I have encountered, so while it works well for nursing, it would be even nicer if it was a tad bit wider to make me feel even more comfortable.  The brim itself was pretty floppy, which has advantages and disadvantages.  I loved it because it shaped well to cover things when I nursed, but when she wore it as a hat, it often flopped into her face.  Easily remedied by having her add the snaps to the hat to hold the brim up.  As I stated I love that it ties, but I almost wish it had a hook and loop closure instead of ties. (snap closure available upon request) The reason for this is that I often nurse while I am wearing my baby in either a ring sling or soft structured carrier, and it’s really hard for me to tie it on her head while wearing her (if she isn’t already wearing it).  It would be easier to plop on her head and fasten a hook and loop closure instead.  However, when I’m not wearing her, it isn’t an issue and the ties actually look really cute and are also nice because no matter what size head your kid has, you can tie it as tight or loose as needed.

All in all, I really love this hat for all the purposes mentioned above.  It’s a fabulous sun hat at a reasonable price and I think it’s great to support people on Etsy.  I get so many compliments on the hat and pattern and she sells many different cute patterns in her store so there are a lot to choose from.  For breastfeeding purposes, I do kind of wish the brim were a tad wider (maybe another inch or two in diameter?), but as it is, it still works great for the purposes of discreet nursing, which is a bonus in my book!

If you’d like you can find lcraftanddesign on Facebook!

For the month of August, DDL readers can save 20% on lcraftanddesign’s hats with code: DDL20.

Kristen received a Wide Brimmed Sunhat free of charge for the purposes of this review.  All opinions expressed are genuine and 100% her own.

This review was performed and written by DDL contributor Kristen.

I was given the opportunity to review the MoBoleez Hat, which is a great alternative to a nursing cover.  It is a stylish hat with an extremely wide brim that can be worn by the baby while breastfeeding and it will discreetly cover all that someone could want to cover while nursing.

When I discovered this product I thought it was an extremely amazing idea.  Why had I never thought of this?  Luckily, someone else did and I was able to try it out with my baby.  As I have mentioned in other reviews, I was extremely determined to exclusively nurse my baby this time around but needed to get over the whole “nursing in public” thing.  I was never comfortable with the idea of using a typical nursing cover because I felt like it was like you were wearing a big sign that told everyone you were breastfeeding.  Alternatives like the MoBoleez Hat has helped me to make it much easier and more comfortable for me to nurse in public with my baby.

The MoBoleez Hat is made of all natural cotton/bamboo fabric, which is nice.  It is a lightweight hat, which is great for the summer months or if you live in a hot climate.  The fabrics in the couture collection are made of cotton and a little bit of spandex material.  It is easy to use obviously…just put it on your baby’s head and you are good to go!  It does come in 2 sizes, 0-6 months and 6-12 months.  They were offering a preemie size as well, but it has been discontinued (they still have some available though).

Tropical Tiles Design

I really loved using the MoBoleez Hat with my daughter.  It is easy to use, lightweight and I can toss it into my diaper bag and it doesn’t even get wrinkled!  I think it’s an amazing idea for someone who wants an alternative to a traditional nursing cover and yet it provides just as much coverage, without being so obvious as a nursing accessory.  In fact, I have used it a few times as a sun hat and when nursing, I have had people come up and compliment me on Suriah’s cute hat (I was reviewing the couture “tropical tiles” hat).

Kristen, Suriah (in Beco), Emerson (in stroller), Me, and Fletcher (in Boba)

I do have a few suggestions though.  I would LOVE to see more designs.  The classic collection has illustrations on them and are cutesy, but cutesy isn’t my thing.  I would like either plain colored hats or simple designs that are more adult-like.  The couture collection has a few nice designs but there are so many nice fabrics out there, I would love to see them offer some different designs.  Also, I was reviewing the 0-6 month size hat.  My daughter has a slightly smaller than average head circumference (30^th percentile) and at 5 months, I feel the hat is a little too small for her head.  It fits because it is a nice stretchy material, but I would like to see a chin strap or something so that the hat doesn’t slide its way off her head.  Also, as a modest person, I think the chin strap might be a good idea to assure me that the hat won’t fall off and expose my boob to the public’s eyes!  I LOVE how wide the brim of the hat is and it really makes the difference with coverage, but I would like to see it have a little more structure to it.  It’s pretty floppy, which is nice in that it molds well to the curves of your breast to keep things covered well, but if the wind blows hard in just the right way…it might jeopardize your coverage.  Also, if it had a little more structure to it, I would be able to use it more as a sun hat as well and it would be the best darn sun hat out there, in addition to being a fantastic nursing cover.

All in all though, even with the slight adjustments I would like to see, I think the MoBoleez Hat is a great product and as of right now, it is my favorite nursing cover.  With it being so hot lately, I haven’t wanted to cover up by wearing layers and some of the other nursing cover alternatives I have require more preparation to cover up.  The MoBoleez Hat is easy and it protects my baby from the sun AND it’s cute.  I can’t think of another nursing cover that does all that as well as the MoBoleez Hat!

If you would like to get your own Moboleez you can find them on DDL Affiliate, Amazon.com or Moboleez.com.
Moboleez Nursing Hats- Amazon.com

Kristen was sent a product sample for the purposes of this review.  All opinions are 100% her own.

The news has been dismal lately.  Every single day I see a new attack on breastfeeding. I haven’t addressed any so far because there have been plenty of other bloggers out there doing it for me.  Today was my breaking point.

Attacking breastfeeding suddenly became the thing to do.  Perhaps the attention that Kim Kardashian received for her tweet regarding nursing in public as “gross” made another “celebrity” think this was her chance to grab the spotlight for a moment.

Img: Hollywood Grind

But because this “celebrity” is Adrianne Curry (I use celebrity in quotes for a reason) she has to go further than the word gross.  In fact, if you go through her tweets she compares breastfeeding to “pooping, peeing’ masturbating, and cunnilingus”  She goes on to say “But to each their own”  This qualifier doesn’t make what was said acceptable.  That is like saying “I don’t like *insert ethnicity here*, but to each their own.”

She admitted she would get blasted for it on Twitter.  And she got some comments, though due to her caliber of followers, most cheered her on and added their own graphic metaphors for what breastfeeding in public is like.

Adrianne also admits that she was not breastfed and was told by some doctor she can’t breastfeed because she has implants. Second opinion?  Because most mothers with implants have gone on to successfully nurse their babies, including Kendra Wilkinson.

Obviously society failed Adrianne, who has had zero exposure to breastfeeding in her life.  And her persona is based upon her appearance.  Her life is wrapped up in looking good and having nice tits.  If her audience saw her nursing her baby they might not associate those breasts with sexy so much as they see them for their intended purpose.

A part of me understands how some women like Adrianne, and the author of the hotly debated article “I Formula Fed.  So What?’” have come to the conclusion that breastfeeding is “creepy.”  I myself, as a teen’ swore I would never breastfeed because these knockers were for entertainment purposes only.  Becoming an adult changed my mind.  I realized that is what they are there for.  I grew up.  I didn’t need an ad campaign to show me breastfeeding is normal. But some people do and I am grateful for groups like Best for Babes because they will change things for the better.

I am still at a loss how a mother like Kathryn Blundell can still deny the maternal instinct to breastfeed.  Even those who choose to formula for work/ supply/ etc issues usually try, and will admit breastfeeding is the thing they should do if they could.  Adrianne, on the other hand, has not yet experienced motherhood or the way it can change you.  While there is no excuse for blasting breastfeeding, especially in such a vile and public way, we can only hope she will change her mind one day and that her opinion doesn’t rub off on the impressionable youth.

I’d love to hear your thoughts!  Have you always wanted to breastfeed?  Did you ever think it was “gross?”  What changed your mind?

Photo Credit: Flickr, AFP PHOTO/PHILIPPE DESMAZES

This article was recently brought to my attention, however it appears that it is 4 years old.  Since the first publishing Rabbi Shmuley has since apologized.  I address that at the end of my response.  No matter how old the article is it is still alive and kicking on the internet and doing damage to new and expecting mothers, perpetuating “booby traps.“

Recently I read the article by Rabbi Shmuley titled “Moms, Don’t Forget to feed Your Marriages” which may as well have been titled “Moms, Screw Nature, Use a Bottle and Give your Husband a Blow Job.”

While I agree being a Mom sometimes makes being a Wife a chore, I think most husbands (good ones that is) will concede that taking care of your child is the priority.  This includes breastfeeding them for as long as the mother and child wish.  In the article, 11 months is thought to be too long!  11 months is a great acheivement, but not all mothers wish to stop there.  As much as my husband would have liked having me back 100% and our bed, he knew how much breastfeeding meant to my son and I.  Plus, he didn’t have to wake in the middle of the night to feed him.  PLUS, any time my son was cranky, I had these magic things that instantly shut him up.

Even if you take breastfeeding out of the parenting equation, marriage still isn’t easy.  Raising a child is a 24/7 obligation.  One that leaves little time for romance and sexy time.  Showering is a chore for most moms if they stay at home.  Then there is the constant house cleaning, dish washing, butt wiping, tamtrum handling, and toddler wrestling.  By bed time most days I just want to veg on the couch and eat ice cream, with or without my hubby.  He is also tired from his day job and night time toddlering that he appreciates the quiet time by playing video games.  These things make us happy, but don’t necessarily equal a candle lit dinner.

In truth, we have been trying to prioritize our marriage by going out alone at least once a month.  Somehow this keeps getting put on the back burner.  We have to find a sitter and arrange somewhere to go.

I am not even breastfeeding anymore!  But our lives are less than sexy sometimes.  The Rabbi wants to see happy, in love couples.  And breastfeeding supposedly makes that impossible.  Really?  Because even while nursing my husband and I took time to hug, to kiss, to cuddle, to say “I Love You” in front of our son, or not.  Being in love doesn’t mean having sex like you are teenagers.  Any married couple knows sex in college and sex after kids are not the same.  Being in love means loving each other even without the crazy drunk pre-kids sex.

Saying breastfeeding turns your husband off may or may not be true.  But that shouldn’t even matter.  I personally got to a point where I wanted my breasts to be left alone by everyone.  I assure you though, my husband never lost interest in them.  And my husband saw me give birth as well, and he still loves me!  He didn’t get “all up in that” but he saw things.  More things than I saw.  Yet we still managed to make another human baby, and I was breastfeeding then too!

Regarding nursing in public, the Rabbi has it all wrong there too.  Some men let their wives run around half naked for the world to see.  To each their own.  But when a mother has the top half of her breast exposed (or not even) this is considered indecent or overexposure?  This will extinguish the spark?!?!  Rabbi, do you know men?  Men get turned on by waking up in the morning.  I think they can deal with their wives feeding their own children on a park bench without a blanket over their heads.  You know what this made me think of?  This reminded me of conservative Muslim women who have to wear burkas in public and only their husbands can see their bodies, any of it.

Articles like this do a disservice to potential mothers.  Women who love their husband and want nothing more than to have a relationship with them even after the baby comes.  Will they choose to formula feed for fear of losing an intimate relationship with their husbands?  Maybe.  Is that necessary?  No.  Plenty of women breastfeed their children for 1, 2, even 3 or more years and still have a loving relationship with their husbands.  And plenty of women formula feed and don’t.  And Vice Versa.  I can’t say there aren’t men who fit this article.  But those men suck.  If your husband can’t be adult enough to get over breastfeeding, you don’t need him.

*** After I wrote this, but before publishing it, someone posted a follow-up by Rabbi Shmuley since he received quite the backlash from his writing.  The article orginally appeared 4 years ago and looks to have been recently republished on Beliefnet.com.  His response can be read on his website. Still, even after apologizing and back pedaling, the damage was done.  Not only to his reputation, but to potential influential readers of his old article.  His first article comes off as misogynistic which he acknowledges.  I understand the point he is trying to make, which is valid, but he did it all wrong. Still, I find the apology a small step compared to the weight and tone of the first article.

When I think back to the many, many times I have nursed in public I notice there is probably a reason no one ever uttered a word to me about it:  I looked like I was doing what I should be.

Most new mothers fear nursing in public more than anything else.  I did also.  I feared showing too much skin, I feared having people confront me, and I feared making others uncomfortable.  I covered myself with a nursing cover and was constantly checking on the baby to see that he was breathing and eating.  It was the least natural experience.  I tried to schedule all of my outings to be right after he nursed, or I would top him off before we left.  No outing was more than 2 hours since I had to be home to feed him again.  It was miserable.  My husband was also paranoid about nursing in public.  He was watch as I did it and if the cover slipped, he would position it back, even if it was my should that was visible.

Eventually I learned that using a cover wasn’t for us.  My baby hated it, and it was a pain.  I started dressing in layers or wearing nursing tops. I would sometimes use a blanket to cover while I latched my baby because that was the one chance someone had to get a nipple shot.

At the time by son was 5 or 6 months we were nursing in public pros.  By the time he was a year I had nursed all over.  Caves, planes, restaurants, parks, amusement parks, public functions, a duck boat, a paddle boat, etc…

Not once did a person tell me to cover up.  Never did someone roll their eyes at me and “tisk tisk” at the obscene act I was committing.  I was always, always prepared with my witty comebacks if someone asked me to put a blanket over my head or feed my baby in the bathroom.  At times I would have an entire dialogue running, playing out the way I was going to make those people wish they had never confronted me.  I almost wished someone would say something, just once, so I got a chance to use all of my comebacks I had been storing up for months!  Fortunately, no one did.

I nursed in public for about 15 months until we weaned down enough to only nurse at home at night or for naps.  But why didn’t anyone ever say anything to me?  You read all of the time about women asked to leave restaurants and public buildings because they were nursing.  And it isn’t geography.  I have nursed in my own town plenty, but in other places.  Rural and urban.  Salisbury NC and Las Vegas NV. I have nursed in front of all classes, the uppers and the lowers and in between.  Certainly someone should have said something.  Maybe they wanted to…

I am a firm believer that confidence was the key to my success at nursing in public.  I was stealthy, I learned how to get my baby latched and in position to keep the key parts away from public view.  I never looked around nervously to see if anyone was watching, or skulked to a corner to feed my baby.  In the company of friends I may have turned around to latch my son and returned, but not always.  I looked like I was doing what I was supposed to be.  There was never a doubt.  I was feeding my son the way it was intended.  He needed to eat.  I had the food.  How else was I supposed to feed him?

When I hear of nursing mothers who are so afraid to nurse in public they pack formula for trips or pump milk in advance, I get sad.  I want to tell them all that they can do it!  They too can nurse in the public eye without fear.  And you know, if someone comes and says something to them, they can rip that person a new one.  Not only is it the LAW that women can nurse their children in public, but it is the baby’s right to eat.  In some states, there are even laws protecting mothers against persecution from obscenity laws or public nudity laws (NY State does) so if something is seen, it is still under the umbrella of breastfeeding, therefore it is not “nudity” or “obscene.”

I always urge women to educate themselves on their rights to be prepared.  But if you look like you are feeding your baby in the most natural way possible, I have a feeling those naysayers might not want to pick a fight.

This post was written by Kristen, DDL contributor.

I love milk.  I also happen to love ice cream…and cheese.  A LOT.  I typically would drink 2 gallons of milk a week, just myself.

Why am I telling you this?  Because 3 months ago, I was told by my daughter’s pediatrician that in order to keep breastfeeding my 5 day old baby, Suriah, I would need to cut all dairy, eggs, soy, nuts and seafood out of my diet.

I had no idea what was left to eat!!!

It really wasn’t a laughing matter though.  At only 4 days old, I was changing Suriah’s poopy diaper, only to discover that it wasn’t poopy…it was blood. I calmly called the on call doctor, who told me to save the diaper and bring her in the next day.  (How I managed to not rush her to the ER is beyond me!).  Before I was able to bring her in the next day, she had about 5 more blood-filled-diapers.  At the doctor’s office it was confirmed that it was in fact blood (I had been hoping I was wrong of course) and that because Suriah appeared otherwise healthy, it was most likely due to a severe allergy.  Whatever she was allergic to was actually causing her intestines to bleed.

After consulting with a pediatric gastroenterologist, it was decided that if I wanted to continue to breastfeed, I would need to seriously change my diet.  And if I chose to not breastfeed, then Suriah would need to be placed on a very expensive, prescription-only formula that is just amino acids.  Her pediatrician told me that it was healthiest for Suriah to get breastmilk and advised that changing my diet was the best thing for her if I could really stick to it.  Breastfeeding my first child didn’t work out as I had hoped because she needed to be supplemented with formula and other problems led to me drying up at 5 months, so before Suriah was born, I was determined to exclusively breastfeed her.  I had been planning and preparing and mentally working on the idea of breastfeeding in public…and then I was told that I needed to change my diet so drastically that I honestly didn’t even know what I would be able to eat anymore.  Oh…and did I mention that I already had a weird diet?  Yeah, I haven’t eaten red meat in about 20 years and I don’t eat any meat off the bone.  I’m really not a big meat eater.

Image from Babble

Lets sum that all up…

*pretty much no meat

*no soy

*no dairy

*no eggs

*no nuts

*no seafood

What the heck is left?!?!

When I got home, I realized that even my bread had milk in it! Giving up dairy was going to be the hardest sacrifice, especially when I realized that dairy was hidden in a lot of other things as well.  But I was dedicated.  It definitely tested my dedication to breastfeeding.  In fact, I had a few friends tell me that they would just switch over to the formula…that it wasn’t worth it to sacrifice so much just to breastfeed.  Even my own family was not supportive of me breastfeeding at this point.  But I did have some friends who supported me and also helped me figure out some things I could eat.  And the fact that the special formula cost $50 for a 14oz can was also a huge motivator to continue to breastfeed as well.  Plus, I had some serious issues with her latch and went through a tough time getting adjusted to breastfeeding…there was some serious cracking and bleeding nipples going on!  I called La Leche League and visited a lactation consultant…and continued to try to figure out what I could eat.

At 8 weeks, Suriah’s pediatrician allowed me to try to work something back into my diet.  She didn’t want me to choose dairy, so we started with soy, as that gave me many more options of what I could add into my diet.  Over the course of the next few weeks, I had to take soy out of my diet again, but then was able to work it back in.  Now that Suriah is 3.5 months old, I am happily also able to eat nuts and seafood as well.  It seems that her severe reaction was most likely caused by a protein allergy to dairy and eggs.  Right now I am not sure how long I will have to go without dairy or eggs, but it’s possible that she may have the allergy forever because her reaction was so severe.

Having to sacrifice so much in my diet, especially some of the things I love most (I consider myself an ice cream and cheese connoisseur), has definitely made breastfeeding much harder…but it’s also made it more rewarding, and as an added bonus, I feel really proud of myself for being able to exclusively breastfeed my daughter for over 3 months and to watch her thrive and grow because of my milk.  Breastfeeding isn’t easy.  It’s hard in so many ways, especially when it doesn’t go as smoothly as you plan, but it’s worth it.  It’s worth not having a big glass of milk with my oreos, or milk in my cereal, some smoked gouda cheese or some of the Guinness ice cream at the new ice cream shop in town (who wouldn’t want to try that!?!?!)…because I know that I am giving my daughter the best nourishment I can, regardless of the sacrifice I have to make everyday.  I love exclusively breastfeeding more than I ever thought I would…but I also can’t wait to try some of that Guinness ice cream some day!