I hope everyone reading has a joyous holiday, no matter what the celebration, and enjoys time with good friends and family.  For us, Christmas is all about spending time together as a family, beginning wonderful traditions. and making memories.  I can’t wait to open that one gift on Christmas Eve, leave the cookies, milk, and reindeer food for Santa, and break out the NORAD Santa tracker to coax Fletcher into bed before the big guy arrives.  I think part of my enthusiasm for “Elf on the Shelf” is an attempt at creating a tradition for our family that is magical and fun, but that has no ties to religion.  Even though my family is atheist, we choose to celebrate Christmas and remember that it is still a holiday for giving.

In my online life I continue to be amazed by the joy that Dirty Diaper Laundry readers bring to me. I am thankful for all of you and for the advertisers and sponsors who keep it going. I am truly fortunate that I am able to stay home with my boys and do what I love.

2012 is going to be another great year for DDL and I can’t wait to bring you along for the ride.

3 Year old Fletcher is the most awesome little guy in the world.  I don’t know how you couldn’t have fun with a kid this age.  He has really grown, even in just the past 3 weeks, and the changes he makes every day are amazing.  These are the many reasons, of a million, why I love my son Fletcher.  

I love the way he has changed over the years.  He started as a serious baby and turned into a comedian.

I love when he randomly says “I love you, mama.” And gives me a huge hug.

I love how he wakes up in the morning.  Today he woke up as a robot.

I love when he says “Hi, Little Buddy.” And pats his brother on the head.

I love that he is a proficient gamer already, just like Mom and Dad.

I love that he knows the names of all of his trains.

I love his sweet voice and the inflection at the end of his inquisitive sentences.

I love that he asks for me to sleep with him, but only sometimes.

I love how he hugs his brother

I love that he can balance a spoon on his nose.

I love how he draws his PawPaw.  He makes sure to include his mustache.

I love that he walks alongside me at the stores now.

I love that he has started calling himself a “big boy” and refuses anything baby.

I love when he cuddles with me.

I love how much he loves his Dad.

I love how he is absorbing so much information, so quickly, and learning every day.

I love that he asks for a lollipop at every Starbucks drivethru.

I love that he says “We’re almost home, kids” at a certain point in every drive.  Wonder where he got that from?

I love that he can spot a diaper a mile away.  He is familiar with my work.

I love his brutal honesty, even when it gets embarrassing in public.  ‘Whoa, you have a BIG TUMMY!” he says to strangers

I love that he plays dead and demands a kiss to come back to life.

I love that he will break it down in the middle of a store, or anywhere he hears a good beat.

I love the pretend food he makes me in our entertainment stand microwave.

I love how he plays “peek-a-boo” with his brother.

I love how he truly seems to have empathy for others.

I love when he lists all of the people in his family.  “Mommy, Daddy, Eberett, Oma, Pawpaw, Lana.”  Lana is his regular babysitter.

I love that he waves goodbye to his daddy almost every morning.

I love how much he loves kitties even though we don’t have one.

I love the random memories he recounts.  He remembers the funniest things.

I love that he can get himself dressed, pretty much.

I love seeing the world through his eyes.  Everything is amazing to a 3 year old!

I love this age and I love that I get to experience it with him.

I was reminded of a post I made a year ago for Fletcher that I wrote listing out all of the reasons I loved him.  It is only fair that I do the same for Everett.  I am also planning on doing another list for my 3 Year Old Fletcher when that time comes.

What I love about my son, Everett

I love the sweet way he leans in every time I ask for a kiss.  He never puckers, just leans and waits.

I love how he signs for “milk” when he is ready to nurse.

I love his drive to fill a bucket with objects and dump out the contents.

I love that he only wakes a few times a night and has since he was born.

I love the song he sings as he falls asleep in my arms every night.

I love that he has been able to stand for months but seems to be waiting to walk until he is 14 months, like his brother.

I love the way he pushes anyone’s hands away when he is being held by me.  He wants to be with me!

I love the two curls that flip out behind each ear and make him look like Grandpa Munster.

I love the fat on the top of his feet.

I love the way he smiles.  It is more than a smile, it takes over his face.

I love the way he holds out his arms to his dad when he walks in from work.

I love that he will sit in a high char while we eat out and behave.

I love that he thinks a crayon is the best toy to hold, much cooler than that 10.00 clutch toy.

I love that he is the total opposite of his brother in almost every single way and it keeps me on my toes.

I love his butt.  It is the chunkiest, cutest, biggest butt on a baby I have ever seen.

I love that he isn’t a terribly messy eater.

I love the way he says Mama.

I love that his first word was Dada.

I love the way he laughs with his brother.

I love that every time I hear an unsettling quiet I check on him and he is “reading” books, not making a mess.

I love the way he buries his head into my shoulder and pretends to be shy when greeted by a stranger.

I love the sound of his giggle.

I love that he blows out of his mouth when I wipe his nose to mimic the sound.  Good try buddy.

I love how he points with his tiny finger at everything.

I love how he covers his ears and rocks side to side when we say “Ay Dios Mio”

I love that he instinctively signs “more” the same way his brother did (and still does)

I love that he uses his Wheely Bug Bee as a walker and ZOOMS across our hardwood floors at warp baby speed.

I love how proud he is of himself when he puts crayons to paper.

I love that he is starting to cuddle.

I love that he will wear hats and not take them off.

I love that he plays by himself well.

I love his beautiful blue eyes.

Our first year together has brought so much love and happiness into my life.  Seeing my two boys play together has made the difficult aspects of becoming a family of four a distant memory.  I know Everett will fight with Fletcher, and life isn’t always easy, but remembering the best moments makes the bitter days easier to swallow.  He has been a much easier baby than Fletcher was.  He is still a baby but soon he will be walking and I’ll be aching for another squishy.  That is why I am in no rush for him to walk!

In case you missed it, I compiled my favorite images and videos into a Slideshow of Everett’s first year.

My 2 Year old son, Fletcher, makes my heart happy. I see him learning more and more every single day.  He is becoming quite the talker too.  I wanted to list all of my favorite things about him because he has been on my mind a lot.

I love that he goes and grabs a cleaning cloth when he spills something on the floor or table.

I love how he runs to his brother every time he cries and tries to make him stop with kisses and hugs.

I love the toys he picks as his favorites.  Currently he is dragging around an old school phone and 3 James the Train Pez Dispensers (with no pez in them).  He even slept with all 3 for his nap.

I love that he falls asleep while I read him “The Tiny Seed” for his nap, every single day, by the third from last page.

I love that he comes up to me, his brother, and his Daddy and says “I Love You” for no good reason.

I love that he now shakes our hands and says “nice to meet you” which sounds like “dee doo.”

I love how he lines up all of his toys in a row and tells them to “go.”

I love (and hate) that he only counts by saying “boo, ba, boo, ba” even though I know darn well he knows the numbers.

I love that he knows so many colors and shapes and finds them everywhere in everyday life, like the triangle on the floor, the oval on a paper, or the rectangle of the door.

I love that he can find the smallest thing, far away, and point it out.  Like a penguin on a Xmas sweater in a store, and then say “wah wah” for what the penguin says.

I love his independent spirit even though it can be challenging.

I love the face he makes when he is mad, and how he sighs and shrugs his shoulders with it.

I love that he still wants to place his hand in my cleavage for comfort, only when he really needs it, as a remnant of our nursing days.

I love when he pats the bed or seat next to him when he wants us to sit with him.

I love how he can always find the moon in the sky no matter how small or dark it is.

I love his concerned nature.  He says “oh no!” when we read books or watch a show in which a person is in trouble.

I love that he enjoys putting on all of our shoes and walking around the house.

I love that he knows what Santa says.

I love how he still wants to snuggle with his face directly on my chest, and will pull my shirt aside to make sure that happens.

I love his smiles.

I love that he has learned the word “mine” but will still share his toys when we ask.

I love the way his hair looks after he wakes up from a nap.

I love how he can fall asleep with his Daddy in the strangest ways.

I love how every “scary” animal makes the same growl, tiger, lions, bears, alligators, and so on.

I love how he grabs my hand and says “walk” when he wants something or wants to play.

I love that his 3rd word was balloon, and how much joy he gets from them.

I love that he says “thank you” more often than not.

I love how he is already an iPhone expert.

I love how he says “home” when he realizes where we are on our drive.

I love the way he plays with his trains and that he knows who Thomas and Toby are.

I love that he knows who Mario is.

I love how he sees older men with mustaches and calls them “pawpaw.”

I love how he talking in a robot voice and says every word he knows in it.

I love that he is an awesome dancer and can pick up any move he sees on TV.

I love how much he loves his brother.

And I love the way he runs into his daddy’s arms when he comes home from work and how excitedly he says “Daddy, Daddy!”

2 Years is a challenging age.  We have plenty of daily struggles.  He throws his fair share of tantrums and he can get ugly.  But I remind myself that I am so lucky to have him.  He is so loving and sweet and bright.  Even though every single day is a battle with the 2 kids, and there is a lot of crying and screaming involved, I am still one lucky mama to the two most handsome boys on earth!

PS.  If you love my boys too, they have a whole YouTube Channel full of their antics.  I upload a lot for our family to see, but you are welcome to watch too!

Photo Credit: Flickr, AFP PHOTO/PHILIPPE DESMAZES

This article was recently brought to my attention, however it appears that it is 4 years old.  Since the first publishing Rabbi Shmuley has since apologized.  I address that at the end of my response.  No matter how old the article is it is still alive and kicking on the internet and doing damage to new and expecting mothers, perpetuating “booby traps.“

Recently I read the article by Rabbi Shmuley titled “Moms, Don’t Forget to feed Your Marriages” which may as well have been titled “Moms, Screw Nature, Use a Bottle and Give your Husband a Blow Job.”

While I agree being a Mom sometimes makes being a Wife a chore, I think most husbands (good ones that is) will concede that taking care of your child is the priority.  This includes breastfeeding them for as long as the mother and child wish.  In the article, 11 months is thought to be too long!  11 months is a great acheivement, but not all mothers wish to stop there.  As much as my husband would have liked having me back 100% and our bed, he knew how much breastfeeding meant to my son and I.  Plus, he didn’t have to wake in the middle of the night to feed him.  PLUS, any time my son was cranky, I had these magic things that instantly shut him up.

Even if you take breastfeeding out of the parenting equation, marriage still isn’t easy.  Raising a child is a 24/7 obligation.  One that leaves little time for romance and sexy time.  Showering is a chore for most moms if they stay at home.  Then there is the constant house cleaning, dish washing, butt wiping, tamtrum handling, and toddler wrestling.  By bed time most days I just want to veg on the couch and eat ice cream, with or without my hubby.  He is also tired from his day job and night time toddlering that he appreciates the quiet time by playing video games.  These things make us happy, but don’t necessarily equal a candle lit dinner.

In truth, we have been trying to prioritize our marriage by going out alone at least once a month.  Somehow this keeps getting put on the back burner.  We have to find a sitter and arrange somewhere to go.

I am not even breastfeeding anymore!  But our lives are less than sexy sometimes.  The Rabbi wants to see happy, in love couples.  And breastfeeding supposedly makes that impossible.  Really?  Because even while nursing my husband and I took time to hug, to kiss, to cuddle, to say “I Love You” in front of our son, or not.  Being in love doesn’t mean having sex like you are teenagers.  Any married couple knows sex in college and sex after kids are not the same.  Being in love means loving each other even without the crazy drunk pre-kids sex.

Saying breastfeeding turns your husband off may or may not be true.  But that shouldn’t even matter.  I personally got to a point where I wanted my breasts to be left alone by everyone.  I assure you though, my husband never lost interest in them.  And my husband saw me give birth as well, and he still loves me!  He didn’t get “all up in that” but he saw things.  More things than I saw.  Yet we still managed to make another human baby, and I was breastfeeding then too!

Regarding nursing in public, the Rabbi has it all wrong there too.  Some men let their wives run around half naked for the world to see.  To each their own.  But when a mother has the top half of her breast exposed (or not even) this is considered indecent or overexposure?  This will extinguish the spark?!?!  Rabbi, do you know men?  Men get turned on by waking up in the morning.  I think they can deal with their wives feeding their own children on a park bench without a blanket over their heads.  You know what this made me think of?  This reminded me of conservative Muslim women who have to wear burkas in public and only their husbands can see their bodies, any of it.

Articles like this do a disservice to potential mothers.  Women who love their husband and want nothing more than to have a relationship with them even after the baby comes.  Will they choose to formula feed for fear of losing an intimate relationship with their husbands?  Maybe.  Is that necessary?  No.  Plenty of women breastfeed their children for 1, 2, even 3 or more years and still have a loving relationship with their husbands.  And plenty of women formula feed and don’t.  And Vice Versa.  I can’t say there aren’t men who fit this article.  But those men suck.  If your husband can’t be adult enough to get over breastfeeding, you don’t need him.

*** After I wrote this, but before publishing it, someone posted a follow-up by Rabbi Shmuley since he received quite the backlash from his writing.  The article orginally appeared 4 years ago and looks to have been recently republished on Beliefnet.com.  His response can be read on his website. Still, even after apologizing and back pedaling, the damage was done.  Not only to his reputation, but to potential influential readers of his old article.  His first article comes off as misogynistic which he acknowledges.  I understand the point he is trying to make, which is valid, but he did it all wrong. Still, I find the apology a small step compared to the weight and tone of the first article.

This Bike.

I remember a few weeks ago Gizmodo.com posted this on their blog. I went apeshiz. I had to have it. But the price tag is steep. 1,300. I don’t have that!!!!

So, readers of my blog, do me a solid. Click that banner! They are giving away 2 bikes. I don’t think I will make it into the top 20 of traffic referrers, but a girl can dream.

I can just see myself carting around my adorable son in this amazing Syracuse weather. I would most definitely wear an adorable sun dress and pig tails (I will make pig tails since my hair is short) to match my bike.

Do you love me? Do you want me to be happy? Then clicky clicky clicky!

Oh, and I will be posting a link in my sidebar too.  You could click that as well.  :)